Maebius Musings

The lovely Nydia recently gave me this award/meme, where I must answer some questions and then ask some questions of my own.    In the spirit of the meme, I’ll cheat a bit and answer ALL the questions (hers, and the ones she answered) just because.

Jen and Ollie’s questions were:
1.Have you ever been skydiving?
yes, and I have video to prove it. I would also love, love, LOVE to do it again sometime.

2.What’s the worst excuse you have ever made to get out of work?

Long long ago when I was in school still, I claimed my father was very ill and I needed to visit him, but he got better. (He was never ill. I still feel a bit guilty about such a bold lie. I blame being a 17 year old jerk at the time)

3.Skyclad or Clothed?

For ritual in a group, I prefer clothed, but have had some very wonderful rituals skyclad (sweatlodge, etc) and do not mind it at all if it’s appropriate or important to the others in group.

4.How many pairs of shoes do you own?
If you count slippers. Four (4). One pair of work shoes, one pair of sneakers, a set of sandals, and a pair of fuzzy slippers for cold nights.

5.What’s your favourite drink?
REgular everyday drinsk, I love smoothies of all sorts. Anything icy and fruity and yummy. As for alcohol, it’s a toss-up between a good single-malt Scotch or a microbrew lager beer.

6.Name the title of the book nearest to you.
The 2010 Staples office catalog! Oh, wait, you probably mean a real book…. that would be The Druid Magic Handbook.

7.What was your favourite toy as a child?
I’ve always been a big fan of LEGO and other building creative stuff. Even today, with my son, we like to spend hours making little creations and mock-battles between armies of figures and LEGO-things. Beyond that, A Stick. Sticks are awesome instruments of expression and creativity. Ask my Scout leaders, I had a penchant for collecting walking sticks and random sword-sticks, and wand-sticks even for as long as I can remember.

8.Would you ever ride a mechanical bull?

I would love to try, someday, but have never really had the opportunity. One of these days I’ll stumble into a bar with one, and give it a shot.

9.What was your favourite subject in senior/high school?
Physics, definitely. I always loved science, and the practical experiment-driven physics classes I took are some of the best memories I have in school. I was lucky that our teacher was the sort who would ask us about weird hypothesis and then stand back and let groups of us design and impliment an experiment to test out our thoughts. That really helped me learn HOW science worked, much more than simple rote memorization of kinematic equations ever did.

10.Have you ever gone to the store in your pajamas?
Yep, proudly, and probably will do it again next week. I have cool PJs though.

Wizardess Epi’s questions were:
1. What is your favorite dinosaur?
I am partial to a Stegasaurus.

2. What is your favorite gemstone?
It depends on my mood, but Loadstone, or Amethyst, or Bloodstone are probably my favorites, with Pyrite close behind.

3. Does Mercury in retrograde affect you?
Honestly, I do not know. I don’t follow the astrological signs as closely as some, and usually only hear about it in retrospect, when someone else mentions “Bah, so glad Murcury retrograde is over soon”. It might, but I do not associate added stress or such things in my life to Mercury.

4. Owl or lark?
Lark, definitely. Owls are cool, and wise, and powerful and such, but Larks are bight and creative and Merry. Much more useful energies to bring into my life lately.

5. Dogs or cats?
Dogs all the way. Cats are funny, and solitary, and I like social creatures who love you, like Dogs.

6. Hedgehogs or hamsters?
Hedgehogs because they are more unusual, but given the choice, hamsters are cheaper, and I’s much rather prefer fish or a turtle overall.

7. Daisies or roses?
Hmm, somewhat of an unfair question as I like both. I’ll stick with Daisies because they grow wild and beautiful. Roses grow wild too, but have a bad reputaiton for needing much more care and control to grow into the best blooms. Daisies are carefree and bloom in hte fields regardless of what we do. I like that.

8. Squirrels or chipmunks?
Chipmunks for cuteness factor, squirrels for being slightly less destructive to our property.

9. If you could BE a movie star, who would you be?
Natalie Portman, or Jack Black. Ms Portman for being awesome and dedicated to her work (Star Wars excluded) and an all-around good person outside of hollywood. I rspect that, and wish I could have that kind of energy and ethic. Jack Black, because he seems to have lots of fun whatever he does, and doesn’t really care what people think of his image as a “screwball”. (if that makes sense).

10. If you could DO a movie star, who would you do?
Hmm, in my younger years, I would have said Winona Ryder (from Beetlejuice, and yes, I was her age at the time, so thought she was HOT) but now I’d have to say either Jewel Staite, Natalie Portman, or Kate Winslit, or Michelle Yeoh, or maybe Morena Baccarin. (yes, this is exposing my geeky side a bit)

Now my own… hmmm…I’ll go about my favorites, curiosity killed the cat’s questions:
1. Your favorite book?
Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy, by Douglas Adams.

2. Your favorite food?
Tough call, but most rice dishes with beans. Borritos with rice, or chili with rice, or simple basmati rice with chickpeas, or… Yum!!

3. Favorite song/band?
Really hard to say, but anything by Gaia consort (particularly “Ravens“), or perhaps Loreena McKennitt’s “All Souls Night” (which still gives me goosebumps when I hear it).

4. Favorite clothes to sleep in?
My PacMan pants! If it’s colder, some random raggety t-shirt also.
5. Favorite first thing to do in the morning?
Sleep more. However, what usually happens is my second-favorite thing, which would be have breakfast and look outside at the things growing and wandering around the backyard.

6. Favorite thing to do before sleeping?
Play an hour or so of a video game if at home…. HOWEVER, (the question said favorite, and I only get to do this a few rare times a year) If out festivaling, then participate in a drum-circle until the wee hours of the morning, then crash with a joyful ache in my arms.

7. Favorite herb?Mint. Specifically the common Mentha spicata or Mentha × piperita. Great flavoring in all sorts of recipes, and grows like a weed, so can be squished underfoot in our yard or picked for tea whenever the muse strikes me in the summer.

8. Favorite Moon phase?Waxing Gibbous, definitely. Shining brightly, lighting the night sky, yet not -quite- at full power. I really like that feeling of “almost” potential.

9. Favorite piece of jewerly?

I do not wear much except my wedding band and a small copper Möbius band ring I made myself (with help from a friendly jeweler). However, My favorite would be a simple beaded ankle bracelet. I have gone through many of them, as I like to use hemp string and wear them until they fall off, then make another at a festival, or as part of a ritual. It’s a little thing, but I feel all sorts of Tribal and Spiritual when I wear one, for some reason, even though I have little “Native” blood in me.

10. Favorite quote?
Hmm, would either be “Nothing is ever what it seems but everything is exactly what it is.” – B. Banzai … or “In a single cup of earth, sings the mystery of the all-expansive universe” – Gaia Consort…. or perhaps “Dare to be naive” – R. Buckminster Fuller

Now for my questions, which is open to anyone who reads this blog. If you made it this far down the Wall-Of-Text, consider yourself a recipient of the Award as well!
1) What is your favorite colour?
2) Which direction do you sleep at night? (head pointing North? West?)
3) Given $5.00 (or equivalent currency) what would you do with it?
4) How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are?
5) What’s something you know you do differently than most people?
6) Do you remember that time 5 years ago when you were extremely upset? Does it really matter now?

Blessings!

Twas beltaine, and the fairie grove
Did shine and sparkle like the waves:
All mimsy were the kiddie troves,
And the mom sats in shade.

“Beware the JohnsonAnne, my friends!
The smile thats bright, the hugs that catch!
Beware the Jubjub Spare, not shun
The wonderous Mountain Clan[ch]!”

We took our crystal shard in hand:
Long time the manxome Tribe we sought –
So rested we by the Tumtum tree,
And stood awhile in thought.

And, as in uffish thought we stood,
The JohnsonAnne, with eyes aflame,
Came whiffling through the tulgey wood,
And burbled as she came!

One, two! One, two! And through and through
The Tribes all chanted snicker-snack!
We joined in song, after not long
and Galumphing echoed back.

“And, has thou enjoyed the Faerie Fest?
Come to my arms, my beamish boy!
O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!’
We chortled in our joy.

Twas beltaine, and the fairie grove
Did shine and sparkle like the waves:
All mimsy were the kiddie troves,
And the mom sats in shade.

Just a quick unfinished post while the topic bounces in my head, so I can refer back to it later with more details…  (how’s that for taunting foreshadow?!)

After seeing the recent Percy Jackson movie, which my family enjoyed, we went out and got the book series (via library and eventually local bookstore).   Currently, we are at the end of book 3, and the kid enjoys a chapter a night before bedtime.   So much so that when he slept over at his grandparent’s house this weekend, they called with a request to bring the book over to read before he would fall asleep.

Throughout the story, the character interacts with a number of mythological figures and events, which are slightly changed to match the more modern narrative and plot.

For example, Chiron is the head councilor at Camp Half-Blood, for example (the hidden place where children of the gods stay and train).  He seems well represented as a wise centaur, and a teacher. When we meet his ‘family’ in the books, they are “Party Ponies” and described similar to crazy frat boys, which is close enough to the myths in my mind.

Dionysis, however, is quite changed in the book series compared to Greek mythology, and is described here, and is essentially a rude and arrogant Staff-member who was punished by Zeus to help at Camp Half-Blood and avoid all alcohol for 100 years after cavorting with a wood-nymph. He cares little for the campers, and often calls them incorrect names, intentionally. This didn’t quite match up to the myths as I understood then, but worked as a believable character in the novels. Still, the basis of his “punishment” has been pointed out to me as essentially flawed, since Dionysis is an Olympian God and free to cavort with any Nymphs he wishes too.

My musing, is whether this light-handed introduction to the characters and place-names of Greek Mythology reenforced interest in them, or waters-down the myth by changing the details too much. I’m sure the answer is complicated, and individuals may have varied responses, as well, but the question seemed valid enough.

Your thoughts, oh readers of this blog?

** Note,  Pīti is a very specific joy associated with a state of deep tranquility. I used that word because it was cool, and different,  and the Buddhist context seemed apt for the subject matter.

This past weekend, I went firewalking with Andrew Steed with a wonderful friend of ours.  It was Awesome.  It was Joyful.  It was a hug-incarnate.  It was all sorts of good happy things that words seem pretty cheesy for when typed out, but still don’t come quite close to the actual Experience of.

Our young son attended, as well, and appears to have had some of the wisdom and Healing that happened there sink in much deeper than it did to curmudgeony old Maebius.  He still talks about building the fire with Intent, and growing your personal energy and Love, and SHAA!

One thing that resonated to me though, was surprisingly NOT the actual walking on coals.  For as much as I love fire, and as awesomely energizing that act was, I was most moved by events before the gathering around the embers.

Prior to the walking, Andrew led an empowering ritual where people broke wooden arrows with their bare throats!    While I’m sure our friend would have loved to see me participate, I was not called to, and was basking in the Witnessing of the whole thing.     After the arrows, they bend a 6ft rod of steel rebar!!

Now, let me tell you, I can repeat the mantras of Witnessing others, and can psychologically try explaining how it’s likewise empowering to support people doing such powerful spiritual acts, but I also admit it’s a heck of a lot of fun to do them yourself too.

This time, I surprised myself by being so caught up it the moment, so viscerally Present, that when each arrow broke, I clapped and smiled like a kid in a candy store.   There was just So.  Much.  Love!  in the room I couldn’t help myself.    When the rebar bent, I don’t think I could even really see it due to misty-eyed, tingling-spined, AWE that was radiating in that room.  I had some profound Piloerection events (mind out of the gutter!).

Even today, almost a week later, and having felt a bit of that Joy slip away over the work-week, the mental thought of that room, with those people, just shines in my heart and makes my feel 10lbs lighter.   I’m reminding myself to carry that feeling all the time, even while at work, because “I’m doing my job Anyway”, and am very grateful for the experience.

Still, the musing of this post is a new, deep-rooted realization that Witnessing, in the sacred context, is absolutely Empowering.  It is impersonal,  non-ego driven, and Participatory.  It’s potent stuff indeed.

I have a much better appreciation of that Avatar Movie, too, so to all my readers….

I see you.   <3

You hear the term “One of those days” most times as a negative thing. Bad stuff happened, you know, it was one of those days? Well, I’m going to redefine the term in my mind. Today is Awesome. It’s one of those days!

This feeling I have today is probably,  (well, most definitely) a result of a workshop I attended this weekend, with Andrew Steed, Kat, Mary, David, Dorita, Molly, Mary, Carly(sp?), Vinny, Aylish, etc, and a myriad of smiling faces that I can picture in my head but would bore some of you readers who know them not.

I’ll have a de-briefing post about the whole firewalk and such later this week, but today, I’m concentrating on how awesome it is RIGHT NOW.

I woke up, the sun was shining, the birds were singing, and as we staggered downstairs to eat breakfast, that kid of ours remarked “I Love Toast today, SHA!”

So, we sang some silly “YEAH TOAST” song, danced around the table as my wife and I got the butter and cinnamon for it, and had the dog happily confused with our antics.

I got to work, and was asked (only semi-jokingly) by my co-worker what they put in the Kool-Aid(tm) this past weekend, since I was apparently smiling too much, and had quite the spring in my step.    I never knew it was possible to smile too much.

Must be one of those days! 

I suppose I’ll join the masses and create one of those Facebook thingies, instead of being the semi-Luddite IT tech that I am.

So… if you want to see that face behind the blog, in booked-form (or whatever you want to describe it as, since there’s really no bookishness to that site, nor will I call the random people who email me “friends” by default)…   Go here: http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000920997704

Enjoy!

(PS:  I may get around to answering friend requests once I get used to the site a bit more.  it’s kinda confusing and strange at first, so forgive any ignored messages you may try to send me)

I’ve felt for the past few weeks now, that my spiritual practice is slightly more selfish and internalized than they could be.  This was most acutely felt (or rather not-felt) during this weeks Equinox.  I had set aside some time to go outside, enjoy the spring-like weather, and welcome the greenery and Life that was appearing around our farm. ( The geese arrived again, six of them this year!)    Yet, it felt a bit hollow and empty.

Oh sure, I’ve lit my candles, taken a few moments to admire and appreciate the budding life around me this spring, but there seems to be something missing.   I’ve fallen out of practice with Faerie-Play (for lack of a better word, since Worship seems the wrong connotation, so I’ll say Play, with the same inflection as capital-L-Love is used sometimes) and an attempt to re-strike that relationship gave me a pretty stern chastisement from the Otherkin camp for falling out of practice to begin with.  So, there’s one item on my to-do list this month.

Still, there’s another aspect of the Divine that I would like to re-connect to, and am not sure the best way to do so.   I want to say hello again to the Gods/Goddesses out there, Bored or otherwise.  Essentially, I would like to reaffirm a Path that includes something more discrete than “The Earth/Nature” (intentionally glossing over the depths of defining “Nature”).

I used to be very active in my Lutheran Church, and had a fairly solid understanding of God.  I redefined my concept of that being, and added other names to “Who is God” as I grew older and more pagan-minded. Still, I’ve never gotten really comfortable with other pantheons in popular use among the Pagani.  Celtic culture is really neat, but I don’t connect to Brigit or Lugh.  Norse Asatru is intellectually intriguing, but I have even less of a bond with Thor or Loki other than lip-service.  Likewise, the recent interest in Greek mythology (ala: Percy Jackson books) is fun reading, and scholarly, but I can not consider myself a student of Hellenismos.

I’ve done a bit of research with my family tree, which contains a fair chunk of ancestors deeply involved with PA Dutch Heathenism, and Hex-craft.  Yet again, my dabblings into that practice seem a bit forced and rote, rather than passionate and rewarding.

So,  here I am at a sort of crossroads.    I’ve got my current Practice and Path, which includes drum-circles, and gardening, and a rather down-to-earth subtle appreciation of The World We Live In, but I am feeling called more and more in my meditaitons to look towards Someone/Something.   The problem is I’m not sure who/what that is.

My question to the readership here is:   Other than continued practice with a particular set of Deities, is there a generalized way of opening myself up to inspiration?   As a (really bad) example, would I gather up an anhk and dagger, calling upon Ma’at or Nuit until something answers… or would I simply ask the spirits and Divine to enter in frith, and wait to see what particular name[s] pops into my head?

Of course, I already understand it’s a somewhat selfish question as well, wanting The Gods to start paying attention to Me…  Still, I’m more curious if I could narrow down my list of options for Me to start paying more attention to Them.

How did you find your current Path?

One very interesting conversation I’ve been having over email regards the popular story of Jesus’ death upon the cross.

For many, the general story of Jesus being stuck up on a cross (Crucified) and returning to life three days later is one of the core staples of Christian religion.   Yet, many are not aware that the bible itself has a few different descriptions of this important event.

For example, the Gospel of Mark (Mark 15:33-36) reads as follows:

33At the sixth hour darkness came over the whole land until the ninth hour. 34And at the ninth hour Jesus cried out in a loud voice, “Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani?”—which means, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”
35When some of those standing near heard this, they said, “Listen, he’s calling Elijah.”
36One man ran, filled a sponge with wine vinegar, put it on a stick, and offered it to Jesus to drink. “Now leave him alone. Let’s see if Elijah comes to take him down,” he said.
37With a loud cry, Jesus breathed his last.

Matthew (Matthew 27:45), as well, recounts an anguish-filled ending for the Messiah, with the crowd and the guards mocking him. (Mathew also adds that there was a terrible earthquake and things happening as He died, whereas Mark says the Curtain of the Temple was torn asunder and it was dark, as if cloudy or an eclipse.)

Now, in contrast this this heart-wrenching suffering of Jesus, where he died feeling a sense of Ultimate Suffering, is Luke 23:42-46

42Then he said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.”
43Jesus answered him, “I tell you the truth, today you will be with me in paradise.”
Jesus’ Death
44It was now about the sixth hour, and darkness came over the whole land until the ninth hour, 45for the sun stopped shining. And the curtain of the temple was torn in two. 46 Jesus called out with a loud voice, “Father, into your hands I commit my spirit.” When he had said this, he breathed his last.

John (John 19:28) recounts a slightly less dramatic ending, where Jesus simply accepts his fate as was foretold, and dies quietly, and never mentions any large supernatural rumblings afterward.

²⁸Later, knowing that all was now completed, and so that the Scripture would be fulfilled, Jesus said, “I am thirsty.” ²⁹A jar of wine vinegar was there, so they soaked a sponge in it, put the sponge on a stalk of the hyssop plant, and lifted it to Jesus’ lips. ³⁰When he had received the drink, Jesus said, “It is finished.” With that, he bowed his head and gave up his spirit.

I find it terribly interesting, that if the Gospels are “taken as gospel” (and that this phrase means essentially “really truly True”, there is such differing opinion on the nature of what is probably the most important event in Christian scripture.

Unless you are a literalist, which I find a strange way of viewing the Bible anyway, it seems that each apostle filtered events to slant His story to a particular audience.   John appears the most unbiased reporter.   Matthew and Mark seem to sensationalize the event like a tabloid newspaper.   Luke spreads more of a message of hope and compassion, describing a calm Jesus reassuring another criminal of his place in Heaven, and gently offering his soul to God willingly.

Interesting, eh?

This shirt made me giggle.
http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_1&listing_id=35071914

Granted, I couldn’t wear it randomly at my workplace, and the sorts of places I would wear this, makes it seem rather redundant (since I’d wear it at festivals where folks ARE dancing naked in the forests)

Sorry in advance for a bit of half-hearted musings today. Been a hectic week, and I wanted to get something on e-paper today before it got hecticer. (yes, it’s a word, if I say it is *grin*)

Often in those self-help books and shows, and within a number of philosophical Spiritual-teachings, I have come across the concept of speaking your voice. Take Action. Stand up for what we believe, and all that. For many (most?) of us, I’m sure that sort of thing sounds great on paper and within a daily assertion, but the actual practice of Speaking Up gets pushed to the sidelines among the day to day chores. We don’t like being on stage, sticking out in a crowd, and such.

I’m no exception, but today I wanted to try a little experiment on voice, and would challenge my readers to try this once today, and let me know any thoughts you have after-wards.

Find a quiet space, like your car, or an empty house while showering, or such, and sing along with a song. In my case, it was in my car with the radio on to a local pop-station. Change channels until you gt a song you like, and vaguely know the words to. If you are in the shower or dusting the shelves at home, run a song through your head as you say the lyrics out loud.

For this challenge, I don’t want you to simply mumble along with it. Take a deep breath, sit/stand up straight, and belt out those notes. Doesn’t matter if your voice is scratchy or sounds like a drowning camel, or even Platinum Album material. No one is around, remember?

Ideally, if you are listening to the radio, you should be loud enough to not actually hear the real singer. Overrun the lyrics in your ears with the ones in your lungs. Yell it if you want, at least one verse, if not a whole song. If you are a bit stressed and can’t think of a song, just stick to sounding a Barbaric Yawp (first part of this video).

I mean really try it, as instructed. I’ll wait…

Then, after you are done, take a little internal assessment of yourself. Do you feel silly? Do you feel guilty or worried about the neighbors? Try to ignore that primary feeling and think again.

I’m guessing that even with any ego-ruled emotions bouncing around in your head, you feel just a bit better than you did before this activity. Perhaps not much, but maybe your shoulders slump a smidgeon less for the moment, or that nagging cough feels a little less nagging this particular minute.

Be honest with yourself.

I will readily admit I don’t consistently set aside time each day for healthy things like meditation or involved spiritual musings. Yet, I wonder how much effect it would have if everyone took 1 minute to just yell or sing each day? To sound our barbaric Yawp, and sing a song of yourself.

Catharsis is underrated.